I constantly have people coming up to me seeking advice. Huge mistake! I am not this orange/saffron robed bearded monk on top of a mountain that is going to tell you the answers to life and set you on your way. You would like me to be because that would make life so much simpler, but no, I am going to be difficult. I think you have enough of those types of monks (in disguise) around you that are not shy about telling you what to do. The caution though is if you listen to them and act upon their advice, what is the outcome?
Here is my challenge with listening to the so called advice monk. Often times we are looking for answers, seeking out our internal truth and we hope that through advice, people will provide the key that unlocks our future. Unfortunately, the only key you get is the key to the locks of those who will give you advice and you are only unlocking their door and world. You are not able to unlock your own lock! Those around you will tell you that you can’t, shouldn’t or won’t on one hand and then the opposite of you can, should or will on the other. They balance why you can’t and then what you can and try and explain a logical and rational view. Sadly, we don’t question the credibility of the source and we accept it as a truth and we alter our path as a result.
Instead of trying to find the answers to life or seeking the monk on the mountain, how about you seek that inner monk inside you. The answers are there and they only need to be brought to the surface. That is why I often say that what you need to do is find the champions and enablers instead of the directors and tellers. The directors and tellers will always tell you what to do and how and why you should do it.
So how do you find the answers to your questions and be your own monk?
• Reflection – it is by taking the time to sit still and consider what you have done and asking yourself what you learned from the experience. We never take the time to really understand outcomes because we are driven to seek out results and not appreciate what happened and how you can learn and grow from the experience
• The right questions and why – it is easy enough to say that you need to ask the right questions, but what are the right questions? Ask yourself questions like: what matters to you; when in life were you the most happiest; what work or classes have you done that resonated and those type of reflective questions..then ask yourself why for each one of them and start making a list
• Seek out the champions and enablers, distance yourself from the directors and tellers – if someone is freely willing to tell you what to do, that is not the right person. What you need are those individuals who are going to ask you what matters, what resonates with you or how can I help you. The director is willing to tell you what they think is best for you
• Silence the noise – there are many distractions out there in people, articles and posts (not this one) that are there to tell you what is best for you. Take everything with a grain of salt and you make the decisions
• Be the driver – don’t let anyone guide or direct you. You are in the driver’s seat and no one should be trying to take away your steering wheel
• Past, present and future – take the time to reflect on the past in order to draw some idea of the future while you stand on the crack that is the present. We need to know where we have been in order to best serve us on helping to guide us on the direction we might need to go. You are the only one who knows your past and you have all the information
• It is a progression – your life is a journey to be appreciated and enjoyed not a race to get to a place and then do a quick look around and off to another destination
You may think you are lost, but in reality you are really not. The answers are within you but you just need to take the time to ask the questions within to unlock the answers. Find, and surround yourself, with the right kind of people. Do all this, and you are worthy of an orange saffron robe because you are then full of wisdom.
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