Absolutely NOT – Not dealing in absolutes

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Remember, according to Obi- Wan Kenobi from the Star Wars series…”Only a Sith Lord deals in absolutes”.…and Siths are not a good thing. According to Siths, you are either on the one side or the other and there is nothing in the middle. Now If you are not a Star Wars fan or don’t know what this means because you have not experienced Star Wars or the Force, let me explain this idea further. A Sith is a negative force and something you DON’T want to be as they deal in absolutes.

This always reminds me how on a daily basis I encounter Sith style thinking when it comes to thoughts about one’s life and career (does this make me Yoda?). It is common for someone to come to visit me, sit and tell me about what they have encountered or will encounter as a career or life choice. They have a couple of opportunities facing them and they are challenged to make a decision because it changes the course of their life. By choosing one over the other, they will give up something to pursue something. Often times, we deal in absolutes because we look at two paths and only see how they separate into the distance.

My first reaction to this is to ask them, “what is the worst case scenario here?” Usually, they reply that it is that I have to choose a path and I will lose out on opportunities. True, but now you have a base to work from. A base is an established point of reference rather than an infinite view of challenges/opportunities. By considering the worst case, I am not asking you to shoot for this but rather consider it so you know where your feet will land…your feet can be there but I need your head and heart else where.

The next step is to then realize the options/possibilities/challenges you have to consider; however, my words are about how you can integrate or incorporate your options to the best path rather than absolutes. What I mean by this is that we are so focused on one road or another, that you sometimes forget that it might mean you can still have all options but it is down the road and not where you are standing. If you want to be an entrepreneur but you have an opportunity with an established company, you can go down one path to the established company; however, while you are in that company, start looking ways to realize your future path to be an entrepreneur. Leverage the present to realize the future. In most cases you can have the best of both but you might have to defer one to get to the other…but you do not lose one to the other if you don’t deal in absolutes.

Understand that you will encounter decisions that are going to impact your future. What you have to remember is if you are going to let the situation dictate how you are going to react or do you decide this. If you don’t, the environment or people around you will make the decisions for you…and I am not comfortable with that. Do not fear that by taking one path, you are going to lose out on opportunities. It is NOT about absolutes. As Yoda says: “The fear of loss is a path to the Dark Side.” Go forward young Jedi and may the Force be with you!

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