As many of you know, I am writing and working on a labour of love…a book on personal storytelling. Completing this book is a mission that I set out to do and anything I commit to – is done! Why?…because I believe in it. I have always wanted to write a book and my realization is that it is a lot harder than it seems. I started gathering my stories years ago and they sat idle as a word document and only exposed to me. Stories, musings and quotes that came to me and dropped into a document so I don’t forget. People started to put whispers in my head about writing a book and that I should share my experiences. I appreciate Adam C for helping me dust off the cobwebs and to start this journey as a contributing author.
I woke up early today with two words…fear and danger. I am not speaking about the paralyzing kind of fear and going down the risky dangerous path where one could get hurt. As I am writing, the fear that enters are about being judged: “what if they don’t like what I wrote?” or “this is it…it really does not have much significance.” or “he wasted all that time for this?” The danger is about expectations. People know me and what if my book is lower in expectations or that there are errors. Writing a book with your feelings, life and thoughts is a bit like running for public office. I am putting myself out there for the world to see.
I have resolved that it really does not matter and I am going to do this as I set out to do. I can only be true to me and my writing. This is part of the reason I am going self-published over a publisher. The content is me and I don’t want a publisher to either reject me or my content since they don’t know me. Equally, I do not want a publisher to change the content for the sake of selling more books…the content is me. I also am not just going to put it out there for the sake of writing a book. If that was the case, I could have put this book out last year; however, I would not have been happy with the content. No, I want to walk that balance of providing quality and getting it done. This is because by not doing it, I have not accomplished what I set out to do and that does not sit well with me. Also, if I don’t do it, what are the stories that I could have shared that might have helped someone. Lynn S sent me a lovely note to say that it really does not matter what I write because it is the genuine Sam and the audience just wants that connection.
Yes, I do have the fear and danger within me but the bigger fear and danger is not to share. Not once have I thought of walking away. I think I take the time to really understand a project or initiative before I commit to it and once I commit to it, consider it done. The lesson here is that one must believe in what they are doing and take the time to embrace it as their own. Before you start a journey – key words, vision, build and implement. This is the process I go through to accomplish. I commit because I believe. If you go in with that conviction, even when things slow down and your passionate fire is reduced to glowing embers, the embers will still burn with intensity, you will once again see that passionate fire rise and get you to where you need to go. In the end, what ever I put out there will be authentic me. My thoughts, insights and ideas to be shared. Some may like it, some may not but fear and danger will not prevent me from reaching what I set out to do. I will tame fear as fear will not tame me!
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